Lupin's Goodbye
by Pchu
Summary: Remus has to leave to do his mission to live with the werewolves but he's not leaving without breaking Tonks's heart. Read how Lupin said his goodbye to her. [ONESHOT] HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY!


A/N: Yes, my second Harry Potter fanfic. Well, more like Lupin fanfic. I guess this will be considered as a Valentine's Day treat...even though it's not a happy story. But it is about relationships and that's what Valentine's Day is all about, right?

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, though I wish it so. That way all the hot guys would belong to me. That means you Daniel, Matthew and David. But if I can have one other wish then I would wish that I can find someone just likeRemus in the world and marry him.

* * *

"But why…why can't we be together Remus?" Tonks pleaded, her eyes glowing with the threat of tears.

Remus tried not to look her in the eyes. He knew that it would make it harder for him to face her. He stood emotionless in the living room of Tonks's apartment. Her sobbing was echoing around the room causing Remus to wince slightly. He wished he didn't have to do this, have to break her heart. But it was for the best.

"Tell me why!" She shrieked with every ounce of disparity. His silence was suffocating her.

Remus sighed out of frustration. "It just won't work. That's why." His answer was short and simple. No emotion, no trace of sympathy, and no hint of regret. Except for his eyes, his auburn eyes showed all the emotions coursing through his body that strained to keep from looking at Tonks.

Tonks scoffed as she began whipping the tears to no avail. They kept leaking from her eyes as if they were flooded to no end. "Why? Is it because you're a werewolf? Remus, you know I don't care. You know that…"

"And you should know that you being with me will only endanger your life even further." Remus interrupted her.

Tonks turned her back to him. It was starting to head back to their old and usual argument. All of their pain, their frustration revolved around it. Tonks just couldn't believe how everything that have been and could be was ruined by just three days out of the month. Three days that haunted their relationship as if it were the plague.

"And you should know," she began. "That I could care less about you being what you are or my life for that matter, as long as I am with you."

"Tonks," Remus started with exasperation. "It has nothing to do with me being a werewolf."

She couldn't believe what she was hearing. It was always because of his lycanthropy. She turned back to him slowly. The tears had stopped. She raised her eyebrow. "Does this have anything to do with Sirius?" She really wished it didn't.

Remus hesitated. He had been trying to avoid any conversation of Sirius since that tragic day at the Ministry. "No." He breathed out.

"Then…I don't understand. Why are you leaving me? Is it…is it because of me?"

For the first time that day Remus looked her in the eye. He really wanted her to understand how much he really cared for her. If anything were to bring the downfall of their relationship it wouldn't be because of her. No, it would be because of him. It was because of him.

"Tonks, listen. I think it's time for you to move on. You need someone…someone more deserving than I am; someone young and energetic…someone who can support you." He was looking away from her again.

"Remus, how many times must I tell you?" Tonks moved herself closer to him placing her hands on his face so he would look down to her. "I don't care how old you are. I don't care how poor you are. I love you for you. Can you please for once put it all behind you? Can you please just let things progress just the way they are?" They stared deep into each other's eyes trying to fully understand the other's motive. "Can you please just wait and see this through?"

Remus grabbed her hands with his and pulled them down from his face. "I can't."

Tears were swelling up again in her eyes. "Why not?" The words barely left her mouth.

This was deeply killing her, but it was killing Remus even more. He had no idea it was going to turn out like this. He had no idea that he was going to fall in love someday. Just when he had it all figured out, when he planned it out so that he wouldn't allow a single soul make their way to his heart, he met her. He had tried everything imaginable in order to prevent it from happening, but his heart gave in. And Remus almost thought he was stupid for trying to live a life without love. But now…

"There can't be any connection between us. Now that I…" He held his breath. "Now that I must be a werewolf, live among the werewolves."

Tonks stared at him hard. Was he playing her? What does he mean 'be a werewolf, live among the werewolves'? Or course he was a werewolf. Nor did she ever know Remus to associate himself with other werewolves.

"Well Dumbledore," he continued. "He thought it best if no one else knows about this. Know that I will be living among the werewolves as a spy. And I cannot have any communications with anyone or else I fear that I would have put their lives in danger, especially you."

Tonks didn't know if she should feel relieved or frightened. She was somewhat relieved to find out that Remus was only shunning her out of protection. But she was also frightened for his life. What if the werewolves found out he was a spy? She dared not to think of what they would do to him. "So what you are saying," she said slowly. "Is that until you return, until this mission is over that it is best for you and me to not get involved?" She raised her eyebrows expectantly.

Remus furrowed his. It seemed like she wasn't getting the point. "Tonks, no I'm sorry. There can never be an us. Not now, not ever. Because of what I am and might become."

"Become?"

"I must convince the werewolves that I am like them…vicious. Yes, that means I must kill if I have to. I will be with them for quite some time that by the time I do return…I might become just like them." His look was somber. He seemed strained from all of his troubles. The thought of having to be like those werewolves, having to be cruel, having to slaughter, having to be what Remus calls them as 'monsters'. He shuddered at the thought.

"No, I don't believe that will happen. You'll still be you." Tonks pressed on trying to make what she said sound believable.

"I wish it so. But even if I were to come back as myself, I hardly think that this…you and I, would ever be the same." He finished off in a whisper.

Remus allowed her hands to fall from his and he resumed to pick up the last of his belongings. Within a minute he was standing at the door with his hand on the knob, his back towards Tonks. He sighed in deep thought about what he was doing, what he was letting go. But he didn't look back for he feared it would keep him from going. He opened the door and stepped out. But before he closed it and without looking towards her, he said his final words to her. "Be safe." He closed the door.

Tonks stood frozen as she watched him walk out the door and quite possibly out of her life forever.

* * *

A/N: I hope you enjoyed it. I don't think it's great, but I know it's better than my other one because that one didn't really have a plot. It was more like a narrative...to just be a narrative. I don't know. --

But I hope you enjoyed it and please...many reviews.


End file.
